Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
there is glitter all over my balls
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
