dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
