She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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