I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
