I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
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