when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize