Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
