At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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