i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
