My room smells like vodka and shame
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
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