you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
