Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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