I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
