I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize