I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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