i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
