Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think my vagina is haunted
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
