That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
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