this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize