I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize