plz talk dirty to me
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
