the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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