two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
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Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Enjoy the penises
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son