I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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