she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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