covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize