I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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