I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
she looked like the before picture.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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