Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize
