FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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