Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
