Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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