Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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