I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Randomize
