I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
