All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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