just tell him i said nine months
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
