just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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