I didn't shave. On purpose
North Korea, Best Korea!
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
