Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
