Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
