STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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