I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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