Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.

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  (773): I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne. http://tfl.nu/lh1l
  Replies (14) Good night (1169) Bad night (1183)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"

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  (202): you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!" http://tfl.nu/xr8i
  Replies (46) Good night (5575) Bad night (602)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.

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  (860): Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water. http://tfl.nu/9vgl
  Replies (6) Good night (4504) Bad night (1063)
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  (325): View more from Texas

  The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am

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  (325): The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am http://tfl.nu/kqzx
  Replies (11) Good night (1217) Bad night (3033)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.

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  (937): This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable. http://tfl.nu/352a
  Replies (25) Good night (1266) Bad night (5233)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend

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  (678): i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend http://tfl.nu/xiia
  Replies (7) Good night (3731) Bad night (1150)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I can feel the alcohol in my calves

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  (518): I can feel the alcohol in my calves http://tfl.nu/p5wf
  Replies (3) Good night (2897) Bad night (959)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases

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  (716): Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases http://tfl.nu/lpic
  Replies (14) Good night (5220) Bad night (1330)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?

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  (208): I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become? http://tfl.nu/ygut
  Replies (6) Good night (1508) Bad night (1391)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.

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  (803): I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night. http://tfl.nu/gwrd
  Replies (5) Good night (654) Bad night (1777)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.

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  (541): We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash. http://tfl.nu/8hyq
  Replies (1) Good night (839) Bad night (519)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick

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  (432): She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick http://tfl.nu/csbc
  Replies (10) Good night (1194) Bad night (657)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.

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  (817): Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go. http://tfl.nu/gkdk
  Replies (5) Good night (861) Bad night (358)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.

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  (413): He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome. http://tfl.nu/kvnn
  Replies (1) Good night (595) Bad night (256)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower

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  (416): No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower http://tfl.nu/t3qe
  Replies (0) Good night (610) Bad night (281)

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