at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
