They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
two words...techno handjob
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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