Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering