this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.