Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
