Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
