He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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